"It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister.[b] The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the very God who gives you his Holy Spirit. (1 Thessalonians 4:3-8)If I can be more honest with you, I have to let you know that while in the course of being celibate, I have fallen short, but even the Bible tells us “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23), but the Bible also advises us to flee sexual immorality. "1 Corinthians 6:18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. 6:19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost [which is] in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? 6:20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's."
I fell short was because of sexual temptation. I was putting myself in compromising situations. I will be transparent with you all, it was one night I had sex with my then boyfriend and in the process, I felt guilty and stopped him and just started crying. I was ashamed with myself for compromising. He was someone I loved, but I got tired of hurting the one I loved most. It was then that I became tired; tired of the guilt, shame, spiritual death, and pain that came afterwards. I was crying out under the conviction of sexual sin. Sexual temptations can be dangerous, but the best way to resist temptation is to stay away from it. Its easy to be celibate when there's no temptation, but that's why there's a need for self-control. Self-control is the fruit of the Spirit. But I Corinthians 7:9 tells us "if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For its better to marry than to burn with passions." Generally, we think that if we've already had sex, we can’t make the choice to be celibate, but we can...with self-discipline, prayer, and patience. Since that relationship, being celibate has changed my life for the better! I have freedom. I have freedom from the emotional, mental, and physical pain! I have freedom to focus on God. I have freedom to trust God for my mate and not have to rely on being sexually active in order to get one.
On the subject of being single, celibate and trying to date, you can ask a man to accept and respect your decisions when it comes to abstaining from sex, and he can either respect you and wait, or he can respect you and move on. In my journey with celibacy and dating, I've dated guys who will say they respected my decision...but as time goes by, and they realize I wasn't giving it up, they move on. I guess some men don't expect you to really mean that you're celibate. About four months ago, I dated a guy and after several dates, I told him I was I abstaining from sex, it was deal breaker for him. Then I dated another guy who wanted me to compromise on sex. However, I never compromised and we both agreed to go our separate ways. I would like to also add, while I didn't compromise on the sex, I had already compromised Gods standard by dating a non-believer. This last guy was a Muslim. Note: When you go out with someone who is not right with God, you've already compromised Gods standard. God set his standard for us when he said, "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14)
As you can see, not many guys want to wait, but we must be reminded me of our significance in God and that we are worth waiting for His best. While we often hear that relationships are about negotiation and compromise, we shouldn't compromise on sex. If our highest commitment is to God, then we won't compromise our convictions in this area. Now, there was a relationship where another guy never tried to have sex with me, and it was during that relationship, he helped me see what I wanted. However, that relationship didn't work out because I wanted more from the relationship (not sex, lol). While others might have viewed him as suspect, I viewed him a saved. Having said all that, the choice to be celibate can be a wonderful thing if you're doing it for the right reasons. I personally decided to abstain from sex for both personal and religious reasons. For a Christian, there's only one celibate commitment and that is from God, and for God. For me, its both a challenge and a deep desire to live as Jesus did. Of course, Jesus was tempted in every way, just as we are, but He didn't compromise. Hebrews 4:15 reads, "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet without sin".
In conclusion, being celibate isn't an easy lifestyle, but by God's grace I have been able to remain celibate. If you are in a sexual relationship, all you need to do is confess your sin to God and repent of it. Repent means you stop doing it. God will forgive you! God loves you and he's always loved you! He's giving you a chance to start over.Remember, you're called by God to purity, not to sexual immorality ! To all of you out there who is celibate, I encourage you to stay faithful to God and to your decision! You can do it! Be encouraged!
No comments:
Post a Comment